Camp OutRAGE 2008

Youth camp was absolutely amazing! I had such an awesome time. This was my first year to go as a leader and God totally blew my mind! It far exceeded my expectations! I had an wonderful group of girls-- Sierra, Madison, Kaitlyn, and Katie. They are so beautiful and have such sweet spirit! I loved watching God work in their lives. Kaitlyn and Katie both gave their lives to Christ at the beginning of the week! God is so good! I had so much fun with them. God blessed me so much just to be a part of that week with them. I feel so unworthy to even be a leader, but I know God has placed me here for a reason. Every night at worship, God's presence could be felt so strongly. One night, with my eyes closed, I stopped singing and just listened to the sound of God's children worshipping. It was overwhelming. During worship while we were singing "Our God Reigns" I started thinking about the fact that God does reign and He will always reign over everything. Regardless of the world leaders, future presidents, or major events that take place in this world-- OUR GOD REIGNS!!! We don't have to worry or be anxious about what is to come because God is on His throne, He is in control, He is sovereign, He sees the big picture, and has a wonderfully crafted plan!

These are some notes from Ryan Fontenot's talk that really impacted me:

Is Jesus worth it?

• Your life?


• Your love?


• Your loyalty?


• Your hopes?


• Your dreams?


• Your future?

Is He worth your today, tomorrow, next year, college career, job, social life, every moment?

Matt. 16:24-27 Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul? For the Son of Man is going to come in the glory of His Father with His angels, and will then repay every man according to his deeds."

Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.

Glimmers

Yesterday I went to the post office to mail a book. I got a box, stepped in line, and began to package my book while waiting. I started to tape up the box, but I was having a little trouble. It probably didn't help that I had a sucker in my mouth. An elderly gentleman was behind me and stepped up to help me. He held the box while I taped. We got it all done and he complimented me on my skill... haha Then I got out my Sharpie to write the address on the box and realized that the address was on the packing slip INSIDE THE BOX! The man just laughed at me and opened the box with his pocket knife... I may not be the sharpest crayon in the box all the time, but moments like that just make me smile. Just to know that there are still such wonderful, kind, caring people out there who help simply because they can makes me so happy. We need to see these glimmers in the dark...

Watermelon

Yesterday afternoon I went to visit my friend Ms. Clara. She is an 81 year old widow and such an awesome woman. We have the absolute best conversations. She makes me smile so much! She always has a story to tell, even if I've heard it five times. :) She was a midwife and raised 12 kids (several of them adopted). She has so much knowledge, wisdom, and a precious love for God. I love going to see her. We just sit and talk, and talk... She is so encouraging and knows the Bible so well! She'll say, "You know in Mark (or wherever), when it talks about..." I'm so thankful that God has placed her in my life. She has the greatest sense of humor too! She is always crackin' me up! She's very blunt about everything. Every time I leave her house, she always apologizes for talking so much, but I don't mind and I know she gets lonely. Yesterday she said that she would just love to have some fresh watermelon. She asked, "How much are watermelons these days?" I laughed and said I wasn't sure. (I don't like watermelon.)

I love to read. I get overwhelmed though by all the books that I want to read, knowing that I'll never be able to read them all... I read fiction and non-fiction. Someone the other day was telling me that they don't like to read fiction because they don't learn anything from it and feel like it's wasting time. I told them that I highly disagree! That may be true for some books, but when I read fiction I know that my imagination grows and I'm working my mind! One of the things I love about Stephen Lawhead, Frank Peretti and Ted Dekker's writing is the beautiful parallels of spiritual things. When I read This Present Darkness and Piercing the Darkness I started to get a grasp on what the Bible means when it says in Ephesians, "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places." Fiction certainly helps me to picture and understand different Biblical concepts. I just finished Black, Red, and White by Ted Dekker and they are amazing! They talk about this "great romance" between a man and woman and also between us and God. In the books they talk about how romantic love between man and woman simply mirrors the love between us and God. He pursues us, protects us, and woos us to Himself... It is only because of His love for us that we are able to in turn give love. These books paint such a magnificent picture of this! Needless to say, I don't believe fiction is a waste of time. :)

So I started Beth Moore's Bible study Daniel. It is amazing, so awesome! God is teaching me so much and I'm loving it! Sunday I was watching a session on DVD and she started talking about how God's Kingdom will one day reign on earth. She said that she believes He will literally reign on earth, and that's how I always understood it. The more she talked about it, the more excited I got! Just to imagine what it will be like gives me chills! And to think that it will be so much better than what I can comprehend! I've thought about all the cool fantasy worlds from books that I've wished to be a part of and I know it's going to be way cooler than that!!! It blows my mind! I can't wait!

I've been told that I'm too picky when it comes to guys. Nineteen years old and never had a boyfriend... Crazy right? haha Maybe I am picky... but I won't settle. Over and over I have to give this area of my life to God and ask Him to take control. It's only by God's grace that I am where I am today. I know all of the characteristics and things that I so desire to find in a guy and I know how much I want that. So as much as I want that, I started thinking about how I want to be everything that my future husband desires. I want to be the Proverbs 31 woman and honor my husband all the days of my life. As Leona Lewis so beautifully sings, "I will be... all that you want."

Expectant Dreamer

God is absolutely amazing. I say that all the time, but I will never fully grasp the hugeness and bigness of His amazingness! haha There is so much freedom when we give our lives to Him. When we let things go-- situations, circumstances, control, thoughts, burdens-- there is so much freedom! We no longer have to worry about it! It's in His hands. I never get anywhere trying to accomplish things on my own. I get so mad and fustrated with myself. Sometimes I feel like I never learn anything and I want to leave myself! But God doesn't give up on me! He doesn't look at my past, my mistakes, or my future mistakes. He looks at me where I am right now and says, "I have faith in you. We can do this. Trust me." What a beautiful God...

I'm a dreamer. There are so many things that I want to do! So many dreams! I want to travel the world, I want to speak different languages, experience different cultures, love people, make a difference with my life, serve, give... I want to adopt kids, I want to live with only what I need and give the rest away, I want to rebel against the world and make them wonder... haha "O God, make me into the woman that you want me to be! Teach me and give me wisdom!"

"People are hungry for God. People are hungry for love. Are we aware of that? Do we know that? Do we see that? Do we have eyes to see? Quite often we look but we don’t see. We need to open our eyes and see."

"We must know that we have been created for greater things, not just to be a number in the world, not just to go for diplomas and degrees, this work and that work. We have been created in order to love and to be loved."
-Mother Teresa