Those things with a man & woman exchanging vows...

I've decided to boycott weddings.  I'm through.  They're just depressing.  And, I mean, who really enjoys them anyway?  You have to clear your schedule, spend money on a gift (and wedding gifts aren't cheap), listen to an old man say things you've heard a billion times, make conversation with people you don't even know, and sit around being bored until it's "safe" to leave, only to be ignored by the bride and groom who couldn't care less that you're there.  Ok...  So there is one perk... The food.  But let's just say that's compensation.