All in Perspective

When I sit down to write the first thought is "Where to begin..." It's always my question, then comes a deep sigh, and stillness until the thoughts begin to flow. I've had so many thoughts running around in my mind today. When you're bored, I guess that's just what happens. Right now I'm at the most wonderful yet uncertain places. I have no plans, no commitments. And I have no idea what this next year will hold for me. Before I left for Costa Rica, I was enrolled in grad school. Now I've decided to postpone that endeavor. I have no doubt I made the right decision in doing that. But now what? Chile, Honduras, Africa, Costa Rica... Only God knows. And I'm counting on Him to lead me.

Right now I'm in Yazoo City, Mississippi visiting family. I've always enjoyed coming down here for the most part. But it seems that I realize more and more how I don't fit in. And many in my family definitely don't understand me. I was talking to my aunts about what it's like traveling by myself. One aunt said that she's scared to just go to the state capital by herself-- and they speak English! But last night I thought about how easily I accept other cultures and see their value, but at times I don't do the same for the culture that I come from.

I've been learning a lot about not judging others and love lately. When I see myself and my faults clearly, it is so much easier to love others. Humility and love are key. It's so crazy how as you grow up you look back and go "Now I understand!!" We must always remember that there are so many things that we don't know about people, situations, and life. So we just have to stay humble and love. Love, love, love. Even when you don't want to or don't think they deserve it. Who are we to judge or withhold love? Do you know who you are? Take a look in the mirror, buddio, and remember the Man on the cross. I hope this lesson sinks deep in my soul. It's something I need to learn.